Defense of Victims and Being the "Bad Guy"

God provides many inspirational ideas for this blog each day, but I tend to go with the topics that hit closest to home, as real life is where the rubber meets the road, as they say...

My nephew is a good person. I KNOW this. I see it in the things he says and does, as well as in the way he interacts with people. His problems, which tend to be pretty ubiquitous with teenagers, is that he tends to pretty lazy and selfish. And the big problem with the kids coming up nowadays, generally speaking, is that no one is drawing lines for them, holding them accountable or responsible for anything, or teaching them what it means to focus on other people.

My nephew tends to spend 90% of his waking hours in front of the computer, playing computer games, socializing, and just generally wasting time. He doesn't have any kind of job at all. None. And he's 19. He doesn't even bother pretending to try to find one, as his mother, with whom he lives, doesn't demand or expect anything from him. Her only "requirement" is that he either work or go to school. And he, after announcing today that he dropped out for the semester, does neither.

His mother, whom I dearly love and cherish, demands little and expects nothing from him, which is exactly what she gets. She is sensitive and caring and loves her children without limits, which makes her an easy mark for those who try to take advantage of her. My nephew has figured this out and does so. I have talked to him several times about this and really thought I got through, but each time he falls back to what is easy and familiar: the selfish victimization of his mother. If someone provided you with food, clothing, shelter, television, internet and expected nothing in return and you did not have a strong moral compass, what would you do?

I laid it out for him earlier today. He said his plan is to work full time for this semester, but when I asked him what he has done so far towards that plan, his answer was next to nothing. I'm sorry, but you cannot spend 15 hours a day wasting time on the computer and pretend like you are striving to work full time. Does he expect employers to bust down the door of someone who barely finished high school and has zero work experience? I know I had TONS to learn when I was his age, so he gets a little slack for that, but he is crossing a real line into evil when he manipulates and uses his own mother to avoid any and all responsibility.

The point of this rant is to remind you that it is crucial to stand up for victims in this world. Not everyone has the confidence or fortitude to defend themselves, even against their own family. My sister would never tell her son this stuff, but somebody needed to, so I did. Yes, he is very angry with me. But do I care? He had to hear these things, even at the expense of our friendship. It's for the good of his character and his soul. The nice thing is that I know God will bring him around. God always does.


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