Newsflash: Communication is Good

Sometimes I get too far into my brain. I get a little too wrapped up in my thoughts and sometimes just expect people to know exactly what I'm thinking. Absurd, I know, but nonetheless, there seems to come a point when I just stop talking and assume everything is just commonly understood. Don't laugh, it seems logical at the time. This approach to communication will be fine in the future, if we ever evolve into mind readers, but until that happens, all it can do is cause problems.

And that it has. My roommate has been telling me of a certain electrical problem for months. I waited a long time to call the electric company because I knew it would be expensive. When I finally did, the repairman pointed to a possible problem in the fuse box, which I tried to partially fix, yet the part I replaced didn't solve the problem. But instead of letting my roommate know of my intention to take another stab at the fuse box before having to scrape together funds for an actual electrician, I simply said nothing. I guess I just assumed she knew, from conversations and from being here through all of the other expensive repairs, that I was pretty strapped for more repair money.

But that was my error. The electrical problem is a real concern, and a particular nuisance for my roommate, as the problem is on her side of the house. In addition to seeming like a callous jerk, I was wrong to not share with her my issues surrounding the problem.

And tonight, she got a little sarcastic with me to vent her frustration about my inaction. And it was well deserved, although hindsight is 20/20. At the time, however, I got grumpy and snippy at her, not because of her or what she was saying, but because I was feeling the frustration of the expensive repair bill to come, and took that frustration out on her.

While separately cooling down, she was also reflecting on what she said and how she could have dealt with the conversation better. When she came back into the room to clear the air, we were both open, reasonable, and accepted each our own fault in the conflict. She made nice for the sarcasm, but I fully acknowledge that it was my poor communication that was the source of the problem between us.

So...the lessons I've learned: 1.) don't lose focus on sharing with others, even when it's about something that makes me uncomfortable and grumpy, 2.) try much harder to not be a callous jerk, 3.) don't procrastinate, especially when people are counting on me, 4.) grumpiness never makes anything better, so stop, and 5.) communication is good, so do it often, and openly. With focus.